JASMINE NGUYEN

PARTY SQUARE!

2010-03-03T22:45:00.000-08:00

TELL YOUR FRIENDS ITS A WOLFPACK PARTTYYYYY! && WERE FLY LIKE A G6!

I had one my most memorable best/worst weekends this past weekend. It all started on Friday when I finally got to hang out with Quincy Quacks! And she noticed that I just needed to go out and have some fun. So we met up after I got off of work Quincy, Tina, and her brother picked me up from my house to go back to Quincy's house so the girls can get ready and drop her brother off. After we were done we headed to her friend Ata's house to meet up with more people to go to the party which I had no idea where it was or who's it was but whatevs! When I got there I felt really uncomfortable because Quincy was cupcakin with her "boytoy" and I hardly know Tina and the other guys at the house were playing COD -__-. So I just did the typical thing and texted on my phone. After we finally headed to the party and the whole wolfpack went to this guys mansion house party and when we got there you know it was chill everyone was pretty wasted already and we were just kind of standing around for a little bit then Tina goes " come on everyone lets take a shot!" I was kind of reluctant to take one because I just already was headed downhill with this boring night and then Andrew convinced me to take one so I did and after a couple more... we all loosened up and had a BLAST! I was basically hanging out with everyone but Quincy that night hahahaha she was no where to be found! It was mainly Kenny that kept me company which was great because I had a great time. Up until we had to leave and it was this silly "ev & santa clara" drama but whatevs then we went back to Ata's house to play bp and cards and stuff then we went home which ended our Friday night.
Saturday night we went back to Ata's house because that was where the partaay was at. So we waited about almost two hours at In n Out for Tina's bf and his friends to buy food and in the end we weren't even going to the same party so I mean I didn't mind too much but she did and if I was in her position I would freakin kick his ass for making me wait that long. So we went to Ata's house and we played King's Cup and I kept losing because I was too busy texting and not paying attention lolol! Thats what I get -_- then we played BP and Quincy had a little fuss with Trung so I ended up having to play 2 against 1 and I WON! muhahahhahah! Im a beast! hahaha so then after my friend Andrew took me home and then I had to wake up the next morning and go to work uggggggh!
Sunday was chill and Tony decided to have a BBQ which was perfect because it was beautiful and sunny and nice outside even though he had it at night and of course I would invite Quincy! And I am glad she came! Well in a short little while that BBQ became a Sunday Party. 3rd night in a row! This was my worst night I absolutely got MESSED UP. Im a light weight I will admit and I got it from my mom she is SUPER light weight. But it's okay first time for everything. Man did I barf and they caught me on camera! OMGOSH. I had the worst hangover it was just oudfnlksafjlka;sjfkl;ajfks;. Well I had loads of fun this weekend and I am so glad I met a bunch of new friends to the point where we are bigger than a wolfpack party we are PARTY SQUARE because we are the business!! Turn any party into a crackin party and without us it aint shiieeeettt!!

[....]
I don't need to say anything anymore because I have said more than enough for the past 16 months. I always say more than enough and its just enough to make him not have anything to say at all. So this is simple, it is his call. But know that time is running out... I can't wait as long as you think I can. I am human too I have feelings. I can't living like this any longer.. this is love torture. So it is your call. I have done all I can do.. and said more than what you want to hear.

2010-03-02T21:20:00.000-08:00

when I feel better I will tell you guys about my best/worst weekend

022510

2010-02-25T20:30:00.000-08:00

As always it is just your typical day... today we had a class meeting about "gradnite" and basically we have two choices but we still have a transportation problem for both of them since we are not allowed to drive ourselves there we have to have a school bus take us to either a cruise ship in San Francisco or Disneyland. The cruise is a 3 or 4 hour cruise for $60-$90 with "all you can drink soda, hors d'oeuvres, and a DJ (so basically it is like James Logan's prom last year except without the 3 course meal.) Or we could go to Disneyland with seniors from all over California for $200 for 3 days. So which should I vote on? I pick Disneyland but then again I get bus sick easily so maybe the cruise their better be a good "disk jockey!"
Mochi is the sweetest and cutest and can be one of the most smartest dogs if she knew how to pee on the pad already!!! Gah she is a FAIL right now! Damn it!
GAAAHH!! ( I am continuing on my post because my laptop died earlier today) SHE PEED ON THE PAD! Well I had to put her on there but still SHE PEED!! YAY MOCHI! :D
Well ABDC was quite interesting / good groups who were on top did their worst performance this week but groups who did bad last week stepped up their game this week. Right now I am watching Taking the Stage and Tyler hurt his ankle OF COURSE! And now he is crying And I REALLY WANT TO WATCH TURN THE BEAT AROUND WHICH PREMIERS TOMORROW AT 10pm!
sigh.... I have a lot to say about me and Shawn right now but I am tired of repeating myself... I just don't know how to handle this... I know it has been 15 months and almost 16 but.. as much as I try to keep it together in all reality everything is falling apart I am falling apart. This is so hard on me.. I know that I am an independent person and I can handle myself but this is the most hardest thing I have ever had to go through.. I feel so overwhelemed and clueless. I mean having him here for 6 straight days was nice but I know that we are people who need our space and you know I don't mind that but this is too much space. I just don't know what to do... I don't want to be that girlfriend that nags to him all the time and makes him do things he doesn't want to but I don't know what to do with my feelings.. I just wish I had an answer to everything.

mellowww

2010-02-24T22:47:00.001-08:00

This week has been pretty relaxing Mochi definitely keeps me company and helps keep my mind off of Shawn. I love Mochi so much I have to remind myself sometimes that I am only dogsitting :[ She needs to hurry up and learn how to pee on the pad!! She already knows to stay away from bedrooms and the bathroom and she knows how to sit but she doesn't know where to pee! oy vaaayy!! But it is okay, it takes time to learn but I am sure she will learn soon :] Going to school can be a good few hours to come back too but every period just reminds me on why I hate the kids at my school.. I want to slap them all. I am so anxious to get out of high school it is not even funny! But then again, I will miss some students from their whom I have grown a really close friendship with. We all have created a lot of memories and there are much more to come :]
Work was actually really fun today :] I love hanging out with my co workers and us goofing around at work. They are the only reason why I stay at Papaya. I just wish that I could really start moving up on my job status but then again I only work like 3-4 days a week so yeaah I am pretty sure this summer I will move up :]

- I wish that Shawn would have a nice talk with me at night like he plays COD

2010-02-23T00:39:00.001-08:00

STARRING MOCHI:

"winter break"

2010-02-22T23:30:00.000-08:00

Before I can even begin talking about how my break went I have to say I was reluctant on having Shawn come since we were in this long lasting argument. I had no idea what to do the moment I saw him at the airport. I didn't want to fake any emotions I was feeling but at the same time I wanted him to enjoy his trip here.

Day 1:
I picked him up at the airport and I was about 15 minutes early. The San Jose International Airport looks absolutely spectacular! It can be a tad overwhelming because it is so big, but it will come in handy when there is a long line :] Well after I picked him up we went back to the house and we sat and talked a little bit about what is going to happen next... after we kissed I realized that all of my butterflies in my tummy flew away. They were no where to be found. I was shocked and confused.. I refused to think I lost my feelings for him but I knew it wasn't because I lost feelings for him it was because he lost my trust. So it is up to him to gain it back... After we talked we went to my aunt's house for the new years party and it was pretty slow and mellow at first then when the red envelopes came out the story turned. I know how it feels to be in a room full of adults that you don't really know where you feel like everyone is staring at you judging you so I tried to be a good host and just let Shawn do his own thing so he could feel more comfortable but my family encouraged him to join us and even though he was hesitant at first he got in line and ended up getting a few extra bucks ;] we played vietnamese lotto and Shawn's luck came in this year and he won one game! (it was split with Louis though)

Day 2:

Valentines Day.. what to do what to do.. well my plan got backfired since new years was still in session and so bright and early in the morning we went to a bunch of family houses to do the traditional family lion dance featuring.. the kids mainly Louis and Newton and dun da na na!!! SHAWN SAYSENESOUK PLAYING BUDDHA! Again, I didn't want him to feel awkward so I begged my family to not let him to anything he didn't want to do but he was a good sport and put on the outfit and played the role like a pro :] We also went to the nursing home where my great grandma is and even Shawn got a red envelope from her! I DIDN'T EVEN GET ONE! -_- Well after we went home and took a nap then went to Todai where we will probably never go again because it was ridicously expensive. And then after we gambled at Tony's house with his family and ended up going home dead even.

Day 3:
SHOPPING DAY NUMERO UNO! Went to Oakridge and I showed off my man like a trophy. Not saying he is one but I was just so glad everyone could finally see him after how much I talk about him they probably know just as much about him as he does himself if not more! Then after we were going to watch a movie but then I didn't feel like it so we met up with the group and we went to Krung Thai which was lame bceause my mom got sick and I had to get her porridge but nothing was open so I got her wonton and gatorade and Shawn and I were mad at each other because both of us have no patience and Shawn just raises his voice quite often and I absolutely hate it when people do that I don't take crap from no one so I get mad when he does that and it was just chaos. So Krung Thai for us was a short quite dinner. Then we let it go in the car going to TapiocaExpress aka tapx. Brian told us it was down the streeet..... MY ASS! It was like 23408320432 minutes away!! Then after we went back home.

Day 4:
okay I don't remember what we did this day but what I do know is that we took pictures on my photobooth with Shawns booty. yeaap thats about it.. wait... I remember this was the day Brian took us to San Felipe road where Shawn was a little pansy and he wouldn't look up oh man... I would tell the story but we have a video on Brian's phone instead I will post that up once I get it..

Day 5:
This was the fun day... the never ending day... well it all started at the Santa Clara Billiards. We were playing pool and as usual guys take over and I sit on the side -_- Shawn is actually pretty good but I am glad to see that these guys really bond well with each other and it makes Shawn feel just like home.. after pool we went to Dennys where the magic happened. I don't even know where to start... well we ordered 12 pancake puppies and it took an hour for them to come out. We were all so tired we had no idea what was going on. Brian hooks all the straws together and sips on the farthest water away from him then Tony's got this asian mob thing going on in the corner then the salt in Ivan's water then the swab of paper on the ceiling.. oh god the night just basically never ended and we laugehd all the way home.

Day 6:
Basically Shawns last day in town and we went to San Francisco with Tom. And again Shawn and I were arguing about parking and blah blah some ridiculous crap at Glen Park Bart because the parking lot was no where to be found. Then we took the bart and it was everyones first time except for me. Then got off on Powell and went shopping! Tom said hi to probably every single girl that he saw and they all either didn't say anything and/or didn't make eye contact or was busy doing something else. It was quite hilarious actually it was the joke of the day. We decided to go back to San Jose to eat and the winner is..WINGSTOP! Guess who we ran into? Thuong, Mila, Jessica, and Andy.Then after we came home and we went bowling at AMF 300 and the first game Shawn beat everyone by a landslide then second game Tom whopped everyones ass HARD. Then we went to Quicklys and realized it was 2 in the morning already.. then we all went home.. and you already know what happens tomorrow... Shawn leaves . BUT theres a twist... Brian comes in the morning to check out the shoes because Brian offered to give him an iphone and so he takes the offer and then later we go to In n Out I knew in my gut we were going to be late if we went and boy was I right.. Shawn ended up missing his flight and Brian ended up not buying them.. which then left Shawn with no money and 2 1/2 hours left. So Brian and I go back and he ends up buying the shoes and Shawn gets half of the money up front. So I try to convince him to stay but he says no.. so goodbye babe.. see you later...

sigh.. the hardest part wasn't saying goodbye it was not knowing if we will last.. I know that hanging out with the guys really helped him feel more comfortable about deciding to move here but he is still too attached to what he already built over there.. I don't know what to do but the truth is there is nothing I can do. This move is all up to him.. I want him to move here of course I do but does he? I asked him to tell me soon so then if all falls down then I can pick the pieces of whats left up quicker...

...

2010-02-12T23:09:00.000-08:00

021210:
just one more day until he comes and we still haven't made ends even. i mean we talked a little bit yesterday but i just was so lost and confused i mean i wanted to believe him but he really broke my heart yesterday. he tells me that "it was a one day thing and he was speaking out of anger." i told myself that after reading that comment i would try my best to not take it to the heart but it is so hard not to when someone says those harsh words to you and it is supposed to be more than your best friend but someone who truly loves you or well at least i thought he did. that is what hurt me the most and all of my anger and disappointment just spilled out when i was texting him yesterday before i went golfing. i just needed to get out of the house and just spend stay occupied and not think about anything.
well on a brighter note, when we were at the Los Lagos Golf Course and the boys were late because they went to McDonalds! It was one of the most funnest golf days ever :] my friends definitely made me forget all of my troubles up until we all had to leave :[ then i called up tom and we went to eastridge and i felt and looked horrible so i put on my shades at the mall yeah i know don't say anything i already know what you are thinking. and tom pretended to be my security guard so i won't look so weird haha "ms. brenda song." and after i made sure he remembered what kind of eyelashes i like and what number (red cherry #1 & 47 :] ) well after that i had a huge craving for Today for some odd reason but we weren't ballin enough to eat it becuase it costs 24 dollars! after that we went to the food court and i had the hardest time picking something out to eat and i think it was because i was just really upset and i lost my appetite when my day is just completely ruined. then we got ice cream and the new chocolate dipped ice cream cones at McDonalds are good! after that i took tom home and then my night basically ended.

021210:
so today i woke up did the usual morning routine then left for school. i completely forgot it was friday until i remembered i was doing a LTA today. well periods one thorugh four were very mellow not tough or had a lot of work at all. during lunch it was hard to really get everyone amped up when my fellow emcee was not very energetic soooo yeaaah i will just leave it as that. after the lunch time activity my last period we watched the cutest movie i forgot what it was called but i didn't sleep for once! haha then after school i went home and took a nap then a call wakes me up and it was my mom. she told me to come get her because she accidently locked herself out of her car so i was like okay and she kept rushing me and things do not go well when i am rushed so i had to get all my stuff ready for work and then i had a feeling i was staring at my room for some reason but then i was like eh whatever im just dazing. then after that i close my door and i realize i don't have my keys and i left them inside FMLx13840842304873280473!!! damn! so then my aunt had to come get me and i had to have her drive me to work or else i was going to be late. so i got my keys went to work and asked my manager trung to take me home after work. today was one of the longest and tiring days ever. it was horrible mentally because when i would listen to our stores music i constantly kept thinking about him and everything that happened and i was about to go into tears but i had to stay professional. he has got me completely drowned. i just lost control of myself and i feel like im exaggerating at times but he is just too special to me and it was just a hard slap in the face. then i try my best to talk to him today but he was always busy so i just gave up. he is right now at the club which i am not suprised but yeah i probably won't get a chance to talk to him until i actually see him tomorrow. sigh... well stay tuned; we will see what happens next...... <3 jasmine nguyen.

&& i am back. sorta.

2010-02-11T11:43:00.000-08:00

wow i just remembered that i had a blogspot! Why make a tumblr when you have a blogspot?! :]

well i am going to try my best and blog everyday like i said.. i will try no promises.

021110:
we have been through so much as a couple. we have had our ups and downs and been through thick and thin. and now i don't know what to think. i mean it wasn't so much the question anymore that i was concerned about it was his reply to the question. " i don't know if i really love her or if i am saying it to please the both of us." after everything we have been through we fought through one of the hardest relationships to maintain being 500 miles away from each other and now everything just seems like a complete lie. i know that he never wanted to move here in the first place and every time he tells me he does i feel like hes lying through his teeth and holding the truth under his breath. i felt completely lost. i had no idea how to take this. i knew i shouldn't take it to the heart because i might have interpreted it wrong but i couldn't help but read that small sentence over and over again to myself all night last night. all i ever wanted was the truth and i know in order to get the truth you must tell the truth and i tell him absolutely everything! i feel like our relationship is at its peak of breaking right now even though that is the last thing i would ever want between us. but if this is how it going to be then i guess i have to accept it. he is coming in two days and i have no idea how i am going to face him. i just wish i knew all of this from the start. i don't know if he is just physically attracted to me or does he really like me? maybe because i am so far away it feels like there really is nothing there it is just someone to talk to at night and someone to call. i am so disappointed in myself and us. i can't even begin to describe how i feel right now that is the best form of expression i could think of but it is so much more. i want to talk to him about this this weekend but it is new years and its supposed to be a great start to the new year. i have no idea what to do... i wish he could just talk to me the way i talk to him so i know exactly where he stands and if the case is that where he stands is no where then so be it.

Goodbye

2009-06-04T23:23:00.000-07:00

Goodbye Seniors class of 2009 you did it! Looking back at all of our memories together it is overwhelming on how fast time has gone by. Today was by far one of my most hardest days to say bye to such a wonderful group of friends. I cannot even begin to start on how special each and every one of you are. When I say "you" I mean to all of my friends who are graduating this year or have already graduated this month. You guys have shown me through the heartaches and joys of life and to always believe in myself and despite any negative connotation any person has ever given to me I can make it through everything. You guys have fought and struggled through high school and are now beginning the start of a successful and prosperous life. I know that each and every one of you will succeed in everything that you dedicate your heart and mind into and come out on top. Keep moving forward and only look back to smile at all of your accomplishments. I only wish and pray the best for all of you guys and nothing more then the best because you guys deserve it. Much love stay beautiful and strong.

Sincerely,
Jasmine Nguyen

thoughts.

2009-04-17T00:26:00.001-07:00

Originally this blogspot was for my personal thoughts until I started using it more for english class although I don't feel like making a new blogspot so I will just continue with what I am here to do; write.

After talking to my friend about his personal relationship it made me question mine. Everything is going so well, a little too well. I hate to be the typical girl that every guy hates but I got to get something off of my chest. Now don't get me wrong I love every little bit of everything that we have it's just that... I know that he likes/loves me, but sometimes it just seems like celebrity's in front of the camera. When we are with other people or perhaps he is with someone other then me everything is different the tables have turned. When the cameras go off and it is just me and him its perfect in my eyes. He shows so much compassion and love. We are definitely both on the same page when it comes to hanging out with our friends and setting our lovey dovey stuff to the side although I wonder if it is even there. Of course I can't expect anything, but hearing my guy friends talk about their girls as if they were their world and how much they cherish and love their girl makes me feel a little left out. But how can I feel left out when I have everything I could ever wish for? I talk him like I am telling a fairy tale, it never ends and only the best comes out from it. Am I just a painting in a gallery? There are things that I don't want to talk to him about because it will always be the same answer. I don't even know why I am getting my head into this but this has been on my mind since the day we first started talking. Why is it so hard for him to tell the world that I am his girl? Yeah, I know that he looks at other girls and being the attentive girl that I am I love attention. But I always flaunt that I am taken and when I see someone all I can see is him. Yea, he may look at them and be impressed for a few seconds but hold back because he is taken but is that the reason why? Just because he is taken? Let me put it this way, when I look at other guys all I see is him. I don't see any other face but his. Whatever I do I always keep him in mind. I choose not to walk away because I am so deeply in love with everything he has to offer and with him. Is it me that he loves? Or the thought of us just for that second that we are alone and once were not it vanishes? I know that if I ever told him about this, he will just say " okay then what do you want me to do go brag about you to everyone and talk about you 24/7" the situation always has to be turned it will never just be heard and be taken into consideration. I hope someday he will realize that yes all of him may be there when it's just us but only half of him is there when the cameras turn on and the other half that is missing is me. I don't want to feel like the bad guy. I am always the one that finds something wrong with us when looking at the bigger picture we are more then good were perfect. When I say I don't want to be that sterotypical girl that every guy hates is that I don't want to be the one that is always complaining and finding things wrong with us. But it's different when I have held it in so long. Am I do anything new? Or are you use to everything from your past. Everytime I see a couple I think to myself... " why can't that be me?" and when I am with him I still wonder... " why can't that be me?" Are we really on the same page?

F. Scott Fitzgerald Quotes

2009-03-24T11:39:00.000-07:00

"The glamour of the rich became an important fact in his life. In his writing, the rich and the "liberated" were to become symbols of the death of the "old America" in the dawn of an age of moral irresponsibility and mindless selfishness. From the very beginning of his career, Fitzgerald would write a poignant moral history of the country."

It says right in the quote that his prosperous days was a big influence on his writings. It gave him insight on American History and since then he wrote about the history of our country.

"He was a very popular undergraduate and gained early fame as a writer for the student drama society."

People recognized his work even during his graduate days which then leads to a promising future and everyone has the power to spread the word which then gives your name out and people start hearing about what you have to offer into this world especially if they like what you do.

Reflections Of American Culture

2009-03-24T11:20:00.000-07:00

Look back at some of your past blogs. What do the books we've read this year tell us about American culture? What do they tell us about some of the challenges or conflicts we have encountered since the beginning of the country? Do the books tell us anything about the American Dream?

Past books we have read reflect on American culture by reminding us our freedom that comes with being an American. For example Huckleberry Finn or Fahrenheit 451. In Huckleberry Finn reminds us that we are all equals and individuals and should not be judged on the color of our skin. Fahrenheit reminds us that the media is brainwashing although it is our free choice to approach the media in whatever way we would like.

SCREIBER!

2009-02-27T20:20:00.000-08:00

Scrieber,
I was not here monday and tuesday of this week (february 23 &24) so I don't exactly know what the blog assignment was. I saw that period 3 had a lot of blogs that were posted which I think they were done in class....

Personal Ads

2009-02-27T20:08:00.000-08:00

Look at all the Personal Ads. Who did the best job of selling J. Alfred Prufrock? What specific details about him did they use in their ad?

I think everyone was creative into making thier ad. All of them were amusing yet advertised J. Alfred Prufrock very well. I forgot which group but there was one in particular where the artwork was outstanding. Who ever drew that has an amazing talent. I thought my group had a real funny one the "love me" shirt I thought of last minute. Sylvia and I had a great time making that poster. Everyone mainly had the same concept, kind of like a EHARMONY kind of thing. Stating what your looking, for what you look like, etc, I enjoyed this project a lot it was fun :]

romantic connection <3

2009-02-19T23:48:00.000-08:00

I think at Gunderson there are a lot of people like J. Alfred and I think his romantic level is very stereotypical in a high school relationship. I don't think its always that people have a "hard" time having a romantic connection with others I think its either fear or choice. I believe everyone in this world has a soul mate out there somewhere in this world but its up to them to stay open minded and make good decisions. The reason why most high school relationships do not work out is because they are immature about their relationship. The word "love" is not a word that should be thrown around it should be taken into careful consideration and a matter of real thought before saying it. Sterotypical high school relationships is basically just misued context, miscommunication, drama, and speed; well in my opinion :] Not everyone matures at the same time and lucky for me I matured a lot faster then others and I experienced a lot of bad and good things about being in a relationship with someone. Although I can say as of right now, I am in the best relationship of my lfie so far.

The American Dream.

2009-02-14T22:54:00.000-08:00

According to Wikipedia the American Dream is defined as,
"The American Dream is the freedom that allows all citizens and most residents^[1] of the United States to pursue their goals in life through hard work and free choice (see Immigration to the United States). One person may place monetary gain as their highest goal, and thus strive for this in a very American way, gaining through ability rather than social status. For another, the American Dream could consist in achieving a state of freedom from money and social structure. These two examples of the American Dream are only drops in an ever-expanding spectrum of possibilities.

The phrase's meaning has evolved over the course of American history. The Founding Fathers education and its consequent career opportunities. It is the opportunity to make individual choices without the restrictions of class, caste, religion, race, or ethnic group. used the phrase, "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." it began as the opportunity to achieve greater material prosperity than was possible in their countries of origin. For others it is the opportunity for their children to grow up and receive an

President Clinton said, "We need a new spirit of community, a sense that we are all in this together, or the American Dream will continue to wither. Our destiny is bound up with the destiny of every other American."

I think the American Dream is still an open choice for everyone. Yes everyone has the opportunity to reach their highest goals unless there are personal issues that get in the way of that but they still have free education from K-12 grade. FAFSA is offered at colleges it is really up to you on what YOUR american dream is. No one can define what an american dream is because it is different for everyone. Everyone has the potential will power to pursue their long term goals and wildest dreams it is just a matter of action and knowledge that will guide them in the right direction to achieve that long term goal.

technology

2009-02-08T01:11:00.000-08:00

Our society is always praising science and technology. We see both of these as progress. Is there a dark side to science and technology? What do we lose? Does it change who we are or who we should be? Does Thoreau have a point when he advocates simplifying life? He doesn't see the need to take a train when he can walk.

Of course there is a dark side to science and technology we are too wrapped up in it. It's to the point where now we rely on technology to do the job for us. Its just making us more and more lazy in my opinion. Thoreau most definitely has a point, people are just lazy now a days and they rely on cars, or public transportation, or cell phones, TV, computers, to keep them busy or get them where they need to go. Which adds on to global warming with the transportation thing.

power of the individual.

2009-02-08T01:09:00.001-08:00

The main characters in the book portrayed a strong dominant attitude that was always for the equal for everyone. No matter what anyone said they still kept their opinions strong and their drive stronger. It was for sure that no one could get in the way of what they wanted to do. I think these books are idealistic because there were abolitionists in our history who have sacrificed their life to give our people their individual freedom. These books are also motivational books and inspirational books.

should not.

2009-02-03T19:42:00.000-08:00

In my opinion I believe there should be no limitation to what should not be taught unless it offends students in anyway. School is a place to be educated with past, present, and future knowledge. According to wikipedia, "Education is the learning of knowledge information and skills during the course of life." how can you learn the skills of life if schools are putting restrictions on what you are eligable to learn?

Debate

2009-01-29T00:08:00.000-08:00

Honestly, I think the should not side should have won. Strong points, strong arguments, good rebutal. Overall there were good and bad things about each side. Tyra's and Martha's rebutals were both very well thought out and presented. Trung had a good conclusion. Ryan had an oustanding presentation. Enrique just made it a bonus for the should not side. My role was to research information for my group.

What would Jim & Huck think?

2009-01-28T23:57:00.000-08:00

I think if Jim and Huck looked at our society today they would be more content with the drawback of segregation. Now I am not saying that our society has become a Utopian society and every race is treated fairly. Although it has improved a lot compared to the society Jim and Huck experienced. The stereotypes of whites and blacks still play an effective role today. For example jobs/careers, for certain companies have either racist or non racist head chairs and they determine the job availabilities. If they are run by white men and you are a colored person trying to get a job although are competing against a white man who might now have as much knowledge and qualities that you have more then likely the white man will get the job. Our world just isn't perfect.

Teaching HF

2009-01-15T11:38:00.000-08:00

What are the arguments in favor of teaching Huckleberry Finn and what are the arguments against teaching it? Which side do you think is more convincing?

I think the book should be taught for people to seek the truth in harsh times. Not everything in this world is go lucky and happy. People need to understand the corrupt world we are living in and handle the truth and maybe change their mind about the world we live in and hopefully try and make it better :]

B A N N E D.

2009-01-15T11:11:00.000-08:00

Why are books or music banned in the USA? Is this beneficial or detrimental to our society?

This has always been an issue in the United States and I'm sure in other countries as well It takes only a small group of people to contradict an idea from an author or music artist against their books or movies to ban their material. Every citizen is granted their own free right to express their emotions through writing. I would say the media and the government tries to brain wash our country into thinking a certain way. Unless people do deep research about the facts that are being said out to the people they will find no truth it in at all; especially our own American history. Pocahontas is a perfect example. In the disney movie she is defined as a beautiful young female adult who later then forms a close emotional relationship with John Smith. When that is NOT TRUE!. If it portrays a racist or sexist or immoral material it will be banned.

Lowest Animal

2009-01-06T11:09:00.000-08:00

"Americans have always had a high regard for progress and self-improvement. Mark Twain couples this admirable national trait with a blistering vision of how far, in his opinion, the human race falls short of its ideals. Think about what you would like to change about human nature, and freewrite your ideas" (Holt 468)

What I would like to change about human nature is animal torture and cruelty as well as extinction. Following along with animal cruelty is global warming and the media. humans will do anything to get what they want but then turns the hypocrisy of humans saying " you can't always get what you want."

Critque.

2008-12-05T11:08:00.000-08:00

Imagine you are Henry David Thoreau. Write a brief review of Dead Poets Society from his perspective. What would he like about the film? What would he object to? Keep in mind the ideas of the Transcendentalists.

The film was sensational. Mr. Keating was an amazing actor and caught the passion right away. The scenery was beautiful and the students were a perfect representation. Mr. Keating was a perfect example of myself and his ideas and interpretations were the same as mine. Overall the movie gave a good show and was educational; I enjoyed it.

Rebellion.

2008-12-03T11:49:00.001-08:00

As an american teenager i am without a doubt pressured to conform to several things. In my life i am pressured to conform to my asian culture. The traditions and conservative views are forced upon me to act on them and believe what they believe. The asian culture is very strict and dominant. It is defiantly something hard to get use to and grow up with.

I have tried to rebel and yet i just get ignored and yelled at so really there is no change in this rebellion. Although my mom understands and some of my aunts understand that the culture is very “old fashioned” and the kids of today are the ones that will have the hardest time coping with it because in our generation anything can happen and we are more privileged then they ever were.

Dead Poet's Society

2008-12-02T11:50:00.001-08:00

In the Dead Poet's Soceity Mr. Keating reminds me of Thoreau beacuse of his individual beliefs and his acts to stand forth and see his beliefs to real life actions. Mr. Keating teaches his students in a way he believes is free for the mind instead of by text which therefore led to the students ripping out the introduction pages in their textbook.

The Key To Success.

2008-11-23T09:47:00.000-08:00

What kind of education do you think is best? Can you get the best type of education in a public school?

I believe the best education is really any education. I believe your education is not based on public or private school it is based on your desire to learn. A teacher could be a well known profound educator although it does not mean that you are necessarily learning anything. You must want to learn and take in the information in your choice. Students who have attended public schools in the worst possible conditions come out being the most successful people in the world. Public or private, a school with only 30 kids or a school with 5000 kids, there is no comparison education is education it depends on the student to drive themselves to be on top.

Civil DIsobedience.

2008-11-23T09:39:00.000-08:00

What is civil disobedience? Have you ever done it? Can it change society?

By definition civil disobedience is is the active refusal to obey certain laws demands and commands of a government or of an occupying power (wiki) in layman terms to ignore the law if it is unjust to society. I am not quite sure if I have personally refused to do something against the government power wise, but I have broken simple laws like street laws. Yes of course Civil Disobedience no questions asked change society. A powerful movement that goes against the law will create change in the society and gives people a voice to fulfill their rights (1st amendment)

Thoreau.

2008-11-23T09:33:00.000-08:00

10 Facts about Thoreau

1. Born on July 12, 1817
2. Died on May 6, 1862
3. Born in Concord, Massachusetts
4. Graduated from Harvard
5. Helped slaves escape on the Underground Railroad and spoke out against the Fugitive Slave Act of 1850.
6. Thoreau was jailed briefly in 1846 for refusing to pay a poll tax during the Mexican War
7. He took over his father's pencil factory after his father's death in 1859
8. Lived in Ralph Waldo Emerson's home and worked briefly on Staten Island as a tutor in 1843
9. Contributed nature essays and poems to the transcendentalist journal The Dial
10. Discussed this act of nonviolent resistance in the essay 'Civil Disobedience.'

Fahrenheit 451

2008-11-20T11:29:00.000-08:00

1. I learned how to play with vocal sounds and make recordings sound more smoother when you put them together by lowering certain sounds and adding mood music

2. In Fahrenheit 451 I learned that Bradbury has a lot of interesting connotations about our world and I underestimated him a lot before the podcast.

3. Working with others, I learned that when it comes down to it if we keep focus and really get down to the nitty gritty we can get anything done.

1. I admired the enthusiasm and sarcastic humor

2. Now that we are more experienced and have been exposed to learning about podcasts I am sure our next assignment will be ten times better :]

I Am An American.

2008-11-08T00:06:00.000-08:00

I am an American
I have the right to remain silent.
I wish to refuse that right-
And if you refuse that right
Everything you say can and will be used
Against you.
Well, I am a poet also...
So that is what I want.
I am of the opinion
That words are not mine until
I am accountable to them.
I am of the opinion that words are the greatest
power
Man can have,
And if I don't have words that are mine then I
am powerless.
I will not be powerless
And I will not be silent.
I have that right
I am an American.

I am an American.
I have the right to say whatever I want,
And I am a poet
So I can say that shit well.
And you have been warned.

In the mouths of poets
Words are like actions:
They define you.

And if your words don't define you,
Then why are you talking?
If you're not trying to go forward,
Then why are you walking?
You should sit down and shut up
And you have that right
But I'm a poet and an American
And my pencil sparks light
With each word that I write;
And I will stand here and fight
To the dawns early light;
As the bombs burst in air
I will stand right there
And I will speak my mind.
I have that right.

I am an American.

I, truthfully, am the truth
You never fully told.
And still don't tell,
But I tell the truthof who you are,
Because I am who you are--
I am an American...
And I tell the truth.

I am old women in department stores
Built atop the consecrated bones
Of Crazy Horse.
I sign credit cards receipts like treaties I don't
intend to honor.
A legacy of debt that can never be repayed.
I am restitution
For the sweet dreams that can't come
To the children who die
Beacuse...
Hush-little baby, don't say a word
And you can't say a word...
Because we built Sears atop your grave
So you can't talk about the blankets soaked with
smallpox
That the government gave.
I am the dead Iroquois babies swaddled in
smallpox
Who watched the chickens come home.
I, Malcom X I-
"I am not here to condemn America
I am here to tell the truth
And if the truth condemns America,
She stands condemned."
I am the so many bones, of the so many balck
men and women,
That fell to ocean bottoms like tracks of the
underwater railroad
That led the wrong way to freedom.
I am all the blank walls standing tall
A middle passage memorial
To the names we do mot know.
I am Japanese-American families
Standing in US internment camps
Concentrating on blank walls,
Remembering Harriet Tubman,
And slow dancing with the ghosts of Cherokees
Imprisoned in Alcatraz
Before they admitted Alcatraz was a prison
And they called it a reservation.
I am all the people imprisoned by the lies we
don't admit to
I am all the people trapped inside the history
that never happened
I am the skeletons in the closet of the people who
died waitng for their
Truth to come out.
I am the truth coming out

I am America.

And if you say that I am wrong,
That if we are not our history,
IF there is nothing but our present
Then we must re-examine our scriptures with an
eye for histroical context
And look at our constitution with a mind to
reaffirm.
For we are not created equal until we say so,
And no commandments are contractually
binding,
And all rights are alienable again.
And freedom isn't certain
But this is-
I am an American
And I pledge allegiance to no flag
And our States are not United.
And to the republic for which it stands
One nation under God,
I say to you this:
There is no one nation under God,
Unless that nation is the world.
For God made
the world
And man made
Nations,
And if God were to honor man-made nations
He would do so under this condition...
That he would honor them all equally,
The way he made them.
So to pledge to one
Is to pledge against others
And to pledge against others
Is to pledge against God
And I'm not ready to go to war with God.
And despite the fact that I think war is wrong...
I am an American.

And I pledge to no flag
But to the people...
Who made it,
Who wave it,
Who salute it,
Who burn it,
Who hide behind it,
I pledge to you.
I pledge to see you clearly
And love you dearly
Like people,
Like mortals,
Like flawed individuals
Who bring your flaws to my America
And sometimes make mistakes.
And when you doI will tell you,
And if you do not hear me
I will not get silent
I will do the opposite:
I will make noise.
You are wrong to go to war
You are wrong to ignore the homeless,
To exploit the poor.
You are wrong to put money
Above life on this earth.
You are wrong to judge people
By how much they are worth.
You are wrong to think
You are entirely free,
If you want me to be silent because you don't
agree.
I am an American
And I will not be silent.

I will not be silent because you will be
Or because you want me to be
Or because you think it wrong to disaree with
my country.
You should read the Bill of Rights and
understand...
This poem was my country's idea.
I am an American
And I will not be silent
I will not be silent
I will not be silent
And you should use these words against me.
--Steve Connell (2003)--

Creative Commons

2008-11-07T23:55:00.000-08:00

1. A good technique to use when interviewing a guest is to prepare the questions ahead of time and make as less background noise as possible. Rerecord the questions so if they are not perfect you can go back to the podcast and make new ones.

2. The ASCAP (American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers) and BMI (Broadcast Music Inc.) are the owners of the main royalty collections for music catalogs.

3. Attribution, Noncommercial, No Derivative Work, and Share Alike are some of the licenses for Creative Common

Reflection

2008-11-07T23:28:00.000-08:00

I enjoy being in this class. I love how we can have open free conversations and grow from that as a family. I have learned different styles of writing and structure and use of vocabulary. I would like to learn more about how to structure my essays better and word choices; diction. I feel I am doing well although I could be doing better. I could dedicate more study hours into this class and work up to my full upmost potential.

Science Fiction Outline

2008-10-28T11:10:00.000-07:00

OUTLINE.

Girl gets injected with poison that turns her into a mutant

when she looks at someone it makes the other persons eyes bleed and they blow up

mutant hunters are out to get her because it shows up on their mutant radar detector

they find her and shes dead

try to find out how she died and why

died because of them

Adapting Books Into Movies

2008-10-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

Can you think of a movie adaptation that was better than the book? Is the movie version of Fahrenheit 451 better than the book? Give specific examples to support your opinion.

I cannot think of a movie version that is better than the book although I know for me and I am sure other people can relate, movies help me understand the book better although the book will always have more detail then the movie and it is more precise because it was specifically written by the author.

Utopia vs Dystopia

2008-10-22T00:12:00.000-07:00

1.Do you believe the future will be better or worse than the present?
I believe that in the future, there are a lot of things that will become better, but in other aspects, things will worsen so then it will even out.

2.How do movies and books usually portray the future?
In books and movies, they tend to portray the future has an already utopian society, or is corrupt and the hero is correcting the world.

3.What will the future be like?
Regardless on who wins the current presidential election, because Obama is for the U.S. economy and reforming it will probably cause other countries economies to fail first, but we can then help others after we start to prosper again. McCain on the other hand, is for global stability, which will cause our current failing economy to completely break down. But that will then help everyone build up. All and all, whoever wins the presidential debate, there will still be pros and cons in the future, and it is impossible to achieve utopia because there always has to be an opposite.

October 2, 2008 12:23 a.m

2008-10-02T00:23:00.000-07:00

THESE LAST COUPLE OF WEEKS HAVE BEEN HECTIC!
the skit is slowly makings its way to the finish line the dance is being perfected the float is on its way and the decorations are planned. man oh man I cannot wait until homecoming is over!

TO MY DANCERS,
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU GUYS! you guys are doing a fantastic job. Do not take my bitchassness as an insult I need to step up my game to get this done. My only wish is for you guys to take this just as serious as I am because I don't know about you guys but I want to CRUSH THE SENIORS!! Tibein thank you so much I dont know where I would be without you girl great job on everything and the dedication you bring to this group. Thuong thank you for staying loyal to this group and pushing everyone to do their best. Gurjant, Stephanie, Emily, Ayuantu, Dylan, Martha, Thank you for pulling through with everything. I know practice is tiring and you guys have extracurricular activities to take care of and I want to send out my love for you guys who are making the time and effort to come and practice with me after school. I am very proud of you guys and keep up the good work I cannot wait to see the look on everyones faces when we rule homecoming week :]

CLASS OF 2010; ONE OH YOU KNOW

2008-09-02T23:33:00.001-07:00

things were going incredible today until I did the most dumbest shit ever. I accidently deleted all of the photos on my new canon xti rebel. I am so sad/mad right now I just want to sleep so goodnight take care sweet dreams byeee

Sunday August 31, 2008 12:56 a.m.

2008-08-31T00:51:00.001-07:00

SO MUCH SHIT HAS HAPPENED I DONT EVEN WANT TO BEGIN TALKING ABOUT IT...

let's just say, i'm sick of people not using their minds.
a deep, intellectual person is so damn hard to find.
most people don't realize the dumb ignorant shit that comes out of their mouth.
all i can say is "dude, you're heading down a horrible route."
use your mind, a beautiful gift that God gave to you.
don't be ignorant, don't be stubborn or careless too.
i'm sick of people not using their minds.
i swear, all these fucking kids do nowadays is whine.
i'm so sad to see how this society has become.
wasted minds, people just be fucking dumb.
i mean seriously, is it so hard to think?
in this life, you either swim or sink.
without your mind, you'll go completely nowhere.
and you'll probably whine and bitch saying its not fair.
well i'm not one of those kids, who wastes their intelligence.
i don't live in the past nor the future, i live in the present.
whining over stupid shit is not how i roll.
being a little spoiled brat won't help me reach my goal.

-by sylvia hoang.

Monday August 25, 2008 12:58 p.m

2008-08-25T12:52:00.001-07:00

I am so confused on what I should do.. I second guess myself on whether I should stay or leave but my heart is telling me to stay although I believe I don't deserve this kind of behavior. I'm willing to stay in this if he is although I want to see change and that may not happen. Yes no relationship is perfect and people do fuss and fight but we have to learn how to compromise. All my life I was known not to take crap from anyone, although I let him take over me and he is doing a very good job at it. I let my guard down because he gave me the relationship I have always dreamed of and everything seemed so perfect.. I don't want this to end but I feel like he just gave up. We have been through so much to let something like this get in the way. So really the choice is his. I don't regret anything at all in our relationship because I have learned and grew so much from it. It's funny how I look at the relationship his friends have and it seems so good and they lasted so long and yet we are struggling so hard to keep ours together but when we are together everything just feels right; well to me it does. I value everything we have and wish for all the things we don't have. I haven't given up but I think he is which worries me. I know that he has told me he can hold a grudge for a long time and whether he wants to admit it or not we are kind of playing a game here. I know that his pet peeve is not answering fast enough on AIM or whatever but I can't help all the time that my phone never gets service and I am a slow replier. He has to understand that and right when I thought he did these habits come back again. He tells me that he is going to ignore me so I know how it feels. That is a great game and he is doing a good job at a game I don't want to play. I hate how every time something good happens to me something gets in the way or gets taken away. I ask myself why does this happen to me?

Noah: Would you stay with me?

Allie: Stay with you? What for? Look at us, we're already fightin'.

Noah: Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.

Gabe,
I remembered this from The Notebook and every time I think about it it reminds me of us. Like I have told you "We can be as happy as we want to be but we got to make it work." I'm not ready to give up on us yet and I want to make things work It's just whether you are willing to help make this relationship grow or not. It takes two people who want the same thing to fight for something as strong as this. I know we have gone through a lot of struggles but we always managed to go through the tough obstacles of life together. I don't want to stop yet, I want to keep pushing and keep moving forward with you. I have done things that I never pictured myself doing for anyone and yet I did them for you, I did them for us. I did those things because I believe and value and cherish our relationship. The thought of us breaking apart tears my heart and crushes it into a million pieces. I never thought we would be in this predicament this early but I told you that I would fight for us through everything, now the time has come and I still stand here with my word that was given to you that I will not give up on us... but its you that I feel is drifting apart and ending everything we have. I have a small box of wonderful memories that I adore with you. I told you that we would open that box together one day in the future. I want to keep making memories not bury them. You are different in a good way and bad way like you told me.. and I know you are not perfect and I know your flaws can get in the way of us 99% of the time.. but I was and still willing to deal with those flaws and push through those bumps on the road to keep moving forward.

I am so tired of tossing and turning at night wondering what he is doing and what he is thinking that it effect my everyday life. As much as I want to put on this I don't care routine its not how I really feel. I do that to keep myself occupied so I don't have to think about what we are going through so my heart won't stop giving up.. but I really do care just when I think about the situation we are in now and what it can lead to I refuse to believe that we could be over.. I don't want to tell myself that even though it is a possibility...

" Have U Ever Been Tired Of Ppl Asking How U Doin And U Say Im Takin It Day By Day. Everywhere I Go I Feel Like Ppl Laughin. Im So Stupid Cause I Let My Good BOY Get Away. My Life Aint Got No Betta, So U Must Not've Got My Letta. So Startin Taday Im Lettin Go Of My Mistakes. Whatever U Wanna Say Baby Im Listenin Cuz I Kno

I Kno That I Hurt And I Dont Deserve You And U Say Its Karma But No I Just Want One More Give Me And Encore Dont Walk Out That Door Baby. Call The Paramedics Cuz Baby I Wont Make It If U Try Ta Tell Me U Dont Wanna B My Baby So Dont Say That to Me If We Cant be The Way We Used to be."

- The Way We Used To Be by Lee Carr

The Way We Used To Be - Lee Carr

[...]

2008-08-12T21:58:00.000-07:00

SON OF A MOTHERS LOVER EVERYONE IS A DICK.

okay.bye.

Saturday August 9, 2008 9:46 a.m

2008-08-09T09:47:00.000-07:00

JASMINE IS BACK!
man oh man has it been a while since i have last updated this thing, a little over a month to be a little more specific. Life has been CRAZY! A lot of pros and a lot of cons. Well lets get this thing started.. :]

Life: Life has been hectic and family has been all over the place with chaos and destruction. The update on my parents is it is officially over and there is no coming back. My dad has finally realized he cannot start this family again because he is just not ready and he never really was. The only thing he could do is bring money in but money has nothing to do with raising a family, it is only a small aspect. Unconditionally love and care is what a family needs to stay together and he cannot be there for us as much as he would like to because its not in his heart to stay. Its understandable as much as I hate to say it I have seen this coming since the third grade. My mom is holding up a lot better than she normally does in situations like this. She keeps herself occupied so she doesn't have to think about the pain. I personally wouldn't mind having a step dad although he would literally have to be the best dad ever. Even though I am not going to be next to her for a very long time because I am heading off to college in 2 years I need to know that this one is a keeper and he will treat her with love and care and be there for her at all costs. If they ever plan on having a kid than the father role needs to come into FULL EFFECT. There is no backing down she needs "A list material not one that barely made it on A list."
Switching topics over to my family in general, we recently had a family trip to the beach and it was great I enjoyed every minute of it even though it got boring most of the time I enjoyed their company and us being together as a family. My cousin Bin or Long dug this like 5 foot hole and it was crazy. This guy always has this goal on every time we go to the beach to build a ditch from the time we get there to the time we leave. Crazy ass asian :] I got to hang out with my cousins Trinh and Quyen since I rarely get to see them since they live in Texas. I am glad to see that they are doing well and are enjoying their trip down here in California. My cousin Bo or Duy is an interesting character but I love him nonetheless. Even though he plays this " everything you do is disgusting and I don't care" type deal he has always been there for me anytime I needed someone to talk to. Even though he is only a good listener. If only he gave good advice too. Really throughout everything I thank God everyday for this guy :] Him and Bin remind me that no matter what age you are, there is always a little kid in everyone you just have to release it. I adore both of my cousins and it is so funny how they make me laugh even when I don't want to about ANYTHING at all. Everytime im having a bad day or I just want to get away I go straight to their house and all of my troubles drift away right when I walk through the door, it's amazing how they can do that to me, i love and respect them :]
Just yesterday my little cousins got into a little fight with each other. Nina had a little over six dollars and she promised the other kids she would buy ice cream for them although Jennifer told her that scribblers were only fifty cents so Nina thought that she would be able to buy enough ice cream for all of the kids. When the ice cream man came he said that scribblers were one dollar and twenty five cents. She realized that she doesn't have enough money to buy ice cream for all of them. The littlest cousin Brandon has this behavior where if he doesn't get what he wants he will cry. So she felt forced to buy him ice cream but she knew that if she bought one she would have to buy one for all of them. After the ice cream man left the older kids got frustrated that Nina had broken her promise to them so they told her that they no longer trust her and they don't want to play with her anymore. She comes running in my room and starts bawling. I tried having a talk with the older kids but of course they will never admit that they are selfish. So there is nothing I can do after that.
I can't quite remember on what happened specifically on what has happened this whole entire month but lets start fresh :] Just today the 3 La La's (Julie, Richard, & I) finally got together at Richard's house. It was a blast hanging out with them as well as Carol and Anthony. After hanging out at their house I went over to my Uncle's new house to help him move. The most FUNNIEST thing happened as we were moving things out of the U-haul truck. I found this cardboard with writing on it in the back. It said " RIGHT EQUIPMENT" on the front than "LOWEST COST" on the back. Oh man we had great laughs with that. Later we all were getting ready to eat and I call my uncle to tell him to buy SPAM I have no idea what happened but there was a miscommunication and he heard STAMP instead. Ten minutes later they come back with 2 stamps and we are all like WHAT THE !!??!?! We said SPAM NOT STAMP!! Oh maan it was freakin hilarious! Than Bin and Bo were having this argument about cameras.... odd I know. But we finally settled on CANNON STI OVER NIKON D80 well Cannon>Nikon. Today was just an overall fantastic day except for the fact that I started my menstrual cycle today BLEH but actually I have been wanting to start it so I guess it was a good day :]

Love: I really dont need to talk about this but overall it is going pretty well :] We recently came out of a huge discussion that didn't go to well but I would rather not say here on my blogspot just because than everyone would be in our business hahaha but it's really a case of our flaws going into effect.

Monday July 07,2008 2:54 pm

2008-07-07T23:40:00.000-07:00

Aw man I haven't written in my blog for a while now. It feels good to be back :] Things have been hectic and crazy these past few weeks. The heat wave in San Jose is just making it worse! Knowing that I have volleyball tomorrow is a bull spit. I really have no idea where to start on what has been going on so I am going to start off with the day I remember the most which is the day when my butt buddie Judie Huynh came down from Oregon to San Jose.
Woke up nice and early in the morning got ready and go with Jimmy Vo to pick up my butt buddie in Oakland. The drive there was pretty cool. When I sit in the passenger seat going to a far place I look like a tourist. I love the view of the city in the car from the front seat even though I see these buildings everyday I just love the view. After we picked Judie up and came home we settled down and first thing we did was set up escape routes; cute huh? After we settled in we went to Vista Park to go meet up with some people and just chill at the park. The weather was perfect although it was boring watching a bunch of guys play basketball after an hour. After that we went to Thuong Nguyen's house and chilled there for a little while than went home. This is where the story gets interesting. Of course we tried sneaking back out because Thuong was having a little get together at his house around midnight. Judie and I opened the garage door and almost got out until I realized that my grandpa could lock the door again and we would be screwed. So I unlocked the front door but than I hear my grandpa come out I was just thinking like fuck my life. So he is telling me that he already knew we were going to sneak out. I rush into my room and just jump on my bed and call Judie. But she was hiding in the garage and she has no service so she had to go outside through our original escape route. I kept telling her to come in but she refused to come in because she is clumsy. So I had to somehow find a way to go out there and get here. The only way I could think of was through the sliding door in the kitchen. Once I got out, I stopped and thought how I was supposed to walk through the backyard without anyone seeing me when their windows were partially open. I dipped down and tried to make a run for it but than I turned around and right when I did, I see the kitchen light turn on and I see my grandpa. I immediately bend down and just try to stay quiet. This was when my heart raced faster than ever in my life. I was breathing so hard there was not one ounce of spit in my mouth. I was right beneath the window he was looking in. After I peek over and see him go to the front door I ran faster than ever to the fence which was the only way out. I look out and I see that it is all clean until I hear the front door open. I was standing on the right side of my dad's Lexus and dipped down. For approximately fifteen minutes I did this sneaking game with him. When he would walk down towards the back of the car I would creep up to the front and when he would walk towards the front I would creep to the back. I have never been so scared in my life. After I thought the coast was clean and he went inside he came right back out! I didn't know what to think but just keep creeping around the car. So than after the coast was officially clear I walk to the park assuming that Judie will be there but than my phone rings and I thought it was Judie but it was my grandpa! Of course my first instinct was to not pick it up. So than I get a call from Judie asking where I am and we meet up at the park with James Gatchalian. For a good ten minutes we were sitting in James car trying to convince Judie to go back inside. I look at my phone and there is a voice mail, it was from my Grandpa. He told me that it was alright and I need to come home and sleep. He knows that we snuck out and he won't tell. After listening to his voice mail I felt so guilty and had to go back to the house. Although Judie refused to go because she was so scared. Right when she decides that she can go back in the house we try to figure out which way to go back in. To our surprise all of the escape routes are a no go. They were all locked. My last resort was to call my grandpa to tell him to open up the door. The first ten calls he did not pick up. I was scared we were going to stay out the whole night because he didn't pick up. Right as he opened the door Judie and I ran to my room and just fell to the ground. Shaking and paranoid for a couple of hours. We called the people that would comfort us the most to try to calm us down because this is the first time I have snuck out and this is the first time that Judie has been caught. What a night it was and after we thought that it couldn't get any worse. Drama started between friends. On fourth of July I went to my friends bbq and lets just say more fights broke out than normal over idiotic things. Low tolerance can do damage. The next few days I spent with my cousin Judie and Timmy and Richard Vo. It was nice catching up with everyone again and going swimming and the drive in. I am extremely tired right now and I would go into more detail about what happened with Timmy and Richard but I am just done typing.

Quote:
"Every time a man stands up for an idea or acts to improve the lot of others or strikes out against injustice, he sends out a tiny ripple of hope... and those ripples build a current which break down the mightiest wall of oppression and resistance. This generation can not afford to waste its substance and its hope in the struggles of the past for beyond these walls is a world that needs to be helped and improved and made safe for the welfare of mankind. And the real question before you, before all young Americans, is whether we will help bring about that future or whether we will not help and stand by." - RFK

Song: Take My Hand by The Cab

Take My Hand - The Cab

June 21, 2008 4:21 pm

2008-06-21T16:22:00.000-07:00

Life: Over these past couple of days, a lot has improved and a lot has changed for the better and for the worse. Family issues are still in play and it seems like a never ending game of bias viewpoints. I can never seem to connect with my dad even though he says he really wants to understand and I try to open up to him but because he is hardheaded and ignorant he won't listen. " Don't let anyone tell you you can't do something" I tell myself that everyday when I see him. My whole life I have tried to please everyone around me and try to satisfy there needs, well now its my turn. I can't take it anymore. All of this negative connotation and the person who tells me he wants to change doesn't make the extra effort to support me with what I have a passion for. Lies on top of lies, thats what hes best at. I know that my mom tries hard to please both of us and I respect her for that. I love my mom unconditionally she has raised me to be who I am today. I thank God for her everyday and nobody can take her away from me, especially him. I have tried to balance my life between school and friends and family but it can never be balanced because one is always heavier than the other. I pray for the day when I will be happy. Just when it seems like everything is going so well someone always gets in the way of my happiness and its normally the same person. I love my friends more than anything. When I am with them, all of my troubles disappear. They always keep a smile on my face and want to see me happy.

Love/Social: Yesterday 1F came over and we had a movie night which didn't go as well as I thought it would. It was fun having everyone over but the fact that my house is a traditional cultured Asian house it's hard for some of them to understand how much respect you need to give to elders especially when you are in their house.It was hard to watch the movie with all of the side conversations going on but I ended up watching the movies after everyone left. I had a really nice conversation with my best friends Julie Tran and Richard Vo. Every time we hang out it is never dull. I love being around them and their positive attitude and how we are all naturally comfortable with each other and can be open minded about anything. We had a very nice talk about each others personal life and I have come to find mine confusing and not entirely to my satisfaction. They helped remind me why I stayed single for so long. It's hard to find a guy that will keep you on your toes and molds who you are as a person. Hanging out at Vista Park was a thrill. I had a ton of fun laughing until I could not breathe. I think the only thing that bugs me when I hang out with the Fam is they don't realize that a lot of their jokes towards me isn't necessary. I understand they are joking around but I don't like to be referred to a porn star. Thats not a compliment to me. I know they mean well but even when I have told them to stop they continue so what am I to do? I guess they are at an age where everything refers to something sexual. It's funny at first but gets old after. Other than that, I always love spending time with them and I feel bad that we are all separated from each other because of where we live. Knowing that, when we hang out we make the best of it. Have a lot of laughs, make a lot of memories, and just appreciate that we are all here together. One Family nobody gets left behind; ohana.

Lesson: "Don't ever let anyone tell you you can't do something" always strive and push yourself beyond the limit. Determination, dedication, and perseverance will give you the drive to succeed in everything you do. Negative put downs will only help you in life. It will make you a stronger person to push you to prove everyone wrong.

Quote: "We are all inventors, each sailing out on a voyage of discovery, guided each by a private chart, of which there is no duplicate. The world is all gates, all opportunities." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Song of the Day: Spotlight by Jennifer Hudson

Spotlight (FuLL) - Jennifer Hudson

June 19, 2008 2:00 a.m

2008-06-19T01:58:00.000-07:00

Life:

I woke up this morning to a beautiful California sunshine gleaming through my window and a lot of missed calls eeek. As usual I was woken up by my little cousins and greeted with my youngest cousin Brandon who is three jumping on my stomach asking me to wake up and play with him. Of course, I told him I would be out in a minute and this is the time I take care of my missed phone calls. I listened in on my voicemails and noticed that Lucy my school's ASB President left me a voicemail saying that there is going to be a last minute ASB meeting today at 12 pm. I quickly checked the time on my phone and realized that I had about ten minutes to get there. Right when I was about to leave my grandma tells me that I need to stay home and watch the little kids. So I had to call in Lucy and tell her, of course it would have been helpful if she had told me a day in advance but there is nothing I can do. I still will continue to take on full responsibility of my role being ASB Director of Dances :] After I dealt with that issue, Richard called me asking what I was doing and I planned on going swimming like I have been doing everyday and asked him to join me. He came over around 130 ish and we left around 330 because we invited Jimmy also and to my suprise Timmy was in the car also! When we got to my cousin's mobile home we hung out there for half an hour just to wait for the manager to leave so we can all go swimming. Just our luck right when we open the gate she kicks us out. So than Jimmy, Timmy, Richard, and I go to Thi's old apartment complex to swim at that pool. Thankfully a lady was there and opened the gate for us. It was fun and it was nice hanging out with all of them. Seeing as I never see Timmy and I see Jimmy every once in a while. After we swam, Jimmy got us all something to drink at 711 and than took me home. When I got home my father and I looked at the stove and saw nothing that satisfied our taste buds so decided to drive to KFC. This is where my day got interesting. I was driving on Monterey and the light turned green indicating me to go right as I turn a car just comes flying past me running through a red light and was an inch away from an accident. It was such a close call I was petrified after that. After getting KFC having chicken and rice just made my day a little better :] After the incredible meal, I took a shower and than got on the computer to check my emails. I saw that my friend Jennifer and Kenny from Oregon was on AIM and remembered that she was in San Jose. Their grandpa past away not too long ago, may his soul rest in peace. The funeral will be held tomorrow at 9 a.m at Oak Hill, I ask God to let his soul rest in peace and be carried to heaven. Kenny and I decided to catch up on things and see how everything was going how life was. Interestingly enough, he and I are somewhat on the same page. It was great catching up with him and hopefully we can call meet up before they have to return to Oregon. It was already getting late and before I knew it it was midnight. So I ended the night making a phone call to James and could not go to sleep after so decided to write in my blog and here I am! Today really was an interesting day and It had me going through a roller coaster of different emotions.

Love/Social:
This is the most interesting topic I believe is to write about. It's hard to express what is going on in my love/social life because there is so much to say and I am still quite unsure about things myself. I met this guy and things have been great, better than I would have asked for. Although the trust issue has been on both of our minds. Im sure everyone can relate when you have found someone that molds you so well your aftraid of losing them. Well thats how I sort of feel. Girls are girls. They have a lot of power to do certain things and guys can easily fall into that. I know that I shouldn't worry too much because it is still early for anything but I guess I am hoping that we will get somewhere in a matter of time and this wont be another reinactment of the past. He does make me smile whenever I talk to him and makes me feel safe when I am around him but when I am not around him or talking to him it makes me worried. I know that the more feelings I put into this the more I push him away so I am not trying to do that; that is the last thing I would do. I love how I can talk to him about anything and it is funny how for the first time, it seems like I don't wear the pants in this, he does. It's nice to finally step down and let the man be in control, not full control but have some authority as to what he wants. I have always been the one to take the extra initiative to keep things going smoothly between me and the guy and I really get tired. It's nice to take a break from that and have someone do that for you. I really miss my family and friends especially the ones that are far away from me and those who I have lost contacted with. I miss my brother Qui dearly and I hope he only gets the best things in life. I am so proud of everything he has done in life and all fo the accomplishments he has made. Only God knows how much I care and love him and one day he will know how much unconditional love I have for him. I know what they say is true when they say "god must have spent a little more time on you." I ask God for him to stand by my mom and help her through her troubles because if she is blind enough to not see what is in front of her she is about to go down the road of troubles. The only person left to help her is you God because she pushes her family and friends away, including myself. I had a long talk with my mother yesterday after my father had left about her seperation and what he has done to her. It's crazy how fast she trusted him again and thats what got her falling in his trap. She doesn't realize that he has brainwashed her to do the things that he wants her to do. She has been spending outrageous amounts of money on things that are not necessary. This is not like my mom, for all of you who know her you would understand where I am coming from. You could say she isn't a dominant strong independant woman. She still needs help and someone to guide her, hold her hand through everything. As much as I have tried helping It doesn't help when she does not learn and take notice on her life. She cannot always depend on people to tell her what to do and how to do it. She is a grown woman and she needs to take position on her life and do this herself. Im not always going to be here. I am almost gone, I don't think that has clicked in her head.

Lesson:

Today I have learned that people aren't always as what you might think they are. I underestimated someone today and for that I apologize. Communication is key and I have experienced that at its worst today. Keep living life as if it were your last. Stop thinking about all the negative things in life wether its going to happen or is happening and just enjoy life. Be happy and enjoy life while your still here because every year it will change. You can never look back at the past and relive anything. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Quote:

"He does not speak the truth but not a lie" - Ravey

Song of the Day:

Fighters by Lupe Fiasco ft. Matthew Santos

Fighters - Lupe Fiasco